This is week five of the writing blog and we read about, and annotate: The Yellow Wall-Paper (Charlotte Perkins Stetson). This week, I will be rewriting a scene from the Yellow Wall-Paper as if it were a fan based fiction concept. For my weekly in my life writing, I will be writing about a time when I made a decision and something had a negative impact on my life. This will be written in first person and past tense and I will be the main character.
Yesterday John and I spend such a wonderful beautiful day in garden outside. He had paid a local errand boy to whitewash that horrid room while we spend a romantic day. When the day ended, John had to leave again due to one of his patients from out of town as he says. Oh I wished I had more time and energy to spend with such a wonderful man as John. I also noticed that the room was more plain and such a bore with it as white walls and now looks like a hospital room. Without that horrid wallpaper that was I starting to grow more fond of. Today I feel very awake and ever so well. Resting had made me think clearer and with more focused. The only difference now was that I have more energy I have noticed that I could think clearer. I have noticed that the woman from the horrid wallpaper was gone with the new paint cover such an empty room. This room no longer feels the same so I was thinking of going outside and because John is not around my bedside. As I tried to open the door I had noticed something strange and that the door was locked from the outside. “John!” I cried and he rushed to the door. “How did you sleep last night my love and how do you feel?” John said and smiled. “ John please open the door. This is starting to scare me.” John walked in wearing a lab coad and with a doll that looked familiar like family member. Behind was a nurse and a policeman like guard. “Today is your check out day,” he said. Could it be that I was imaging or hallucinating the whole time I was here with John. I was ever so trapped from the beginning of my stay here. This place, this horrid place with its barred windows and grounded bed was asylum all along. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ I grow tired of this place and sometimes regret why I had reenlisted 2 years ago. It’s a scorching 120 degree in Balad, Iraq, one hour away from capital, Baghdad. I have been stuck in this desert carrying this M249 machine gun everywhere for almost a year now. The whole year has been gruelling with sixteen to eighteen hour working days, with no days off. Not to mention the indirect fire, random bullet hits, rockets, mortars, and lack of sleep. Sleep is a luxury, and I wish I was in bed now. I’m starting to miss the days when I use to wake up on Sunday mornings racing my brother to watch television, I would watch cartoons like Dragon Ball Z or Dexter’s Laboratory with a bowl of cereal, back when I was younger. Then after thinking about cereal and food, my stomach is now growling. Recently they told us that we need to start rationing our food and water because it was running low. Two months ago they told us that there is no more showering and no more laundry. I’m so hungry, I’m so tired, and I smell like an animal’s corps, but I’m happy because we are told that we are going back home soon. There’s a sand storm right now and I can’t believe I’m thinking that this is great because this will blot out the sun. It’s the simple things in life, I guess. So me and my friends decided to run to a in a large conex container or shipping container, it’s once you see at dockyards. I figure this is a good and safe place to hide while sand storm continues. I then sat down and continued to wait. This sand will get into anything and everything but I’m content and secured with my friends and this girl that I had a crush on was there while we wait. I guess must have dozed off. I looked up and my friends were carrying me into a humvee. I asked them what happened. Nobody said anything. Everyone of my friends looks worried and sad with fear was in their face. The girl that is with us was crying now and said goodbye to me. I feel so confused.Why am I bleeding? They rushed me into the hospital and they started cutting my clothes off. I’m feel so tired. The doctors were yelling. “ Keep him awake!” but when woke up, I was in a hospital in Landstul, Germany.
6 Comments
9/30/2018 03:21:21 pm
First thank you for your service your experience really got to me and you did a great job with action and description.
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9/30/2018 05:15:43 pm
I admire how honest and vivid you are in telling your stores about being overseas. That takes courage to visit past painful experiences, i truly tip my hat.
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coleman clark
10/1/2018 08:35:56 am
you were so blunt with your feeling that they were clear as crystal to the reader. writing about things like this can be hard but you did it very well.
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Devon
10/1/2018 09:58:39 am
i remember you telling me the story about when you got your concussion overseas but the way you wrote it here was so powerful it felt like i could clearly picture exactly what was happening in that moment.
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Seth
10/1/2018 07:28:28 pm
This is such a powerful scene you chose to write about! I really like the way you showed your emotions it definitely helped bring the story alive.
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Katina
10/5/2018 12:43:24 pm
This story is very intriguing; I hope to learn more. You did an amazing job using description helping us to feel more connected to your story. Thank you for sharing this with everyone.
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Ray CabanceI'm a student at Delaware County Community College and I major in Criminal Justice. Currently working for the State of Pennsylvania Department of Corrections. Archives
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